Sunday, April 29, 2012

DO what you SAY and SAY what you DO...

I can now proudly say that I have achieved this status:


No more talk cock but action equals zero. And I'll remember this for the rest of my life.

Although at times, this very principle could also put you in a dangerous situation, but deep inside you know you did something great for yourself, that you honor your own promise to yourself.

And because of this principle i hold, i have made a stupid bet with a sohai that whoever fails will have to chop off 2 inches. At the end of the day, we both get to keep the 2 inches. Lucky, I still remain at 8 inches. I don't know about my sohai friend though. Wow! Talking about high stakes!

Thursday, April 19, 2012

what "despicable me" taught me?

1. That it is possible to steal the moon!

2. That being a villain can be so, so, cool.

3. That Lehman Brothers Bank = Evil Bank

4. If you could dream it, you could build it! (The home-made rocket could be built also mar...)

5. Cookies are the best weapon of all.

6. Some people will never ever be impressed by anything great you have done. All they could say is...huh?

7. Missiles are just overrated, a fat guy could just jump over and dodge them at point blank.

8. In the near future, North Korea will have the most advanced technology, coz they will be the one to invent "Shrink Ray" gun.

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

short movie script: don't JUMP to conclusion

imagine this

in a coffee shop....
background music is those old old chinese songs...
scene of the ceiling fans...

scene 1 :
Under the coffee table, the foot wearing a slipper, legs scratching, saw a mountain of cigarette butts piling...
A new butt gets thrown down...and the ant that passes by got stacked by it, and on fire...

camera moves to scene 2: to the left of the round table...
A man's leg on a short, and legs shaking vigorously...
wearing the slipper cap seng tat
a big pile of kuaci was on the floor...

camera moves to scene 3: to the left
A woman's leg wearing a yellow boot aka those phua chu kang style, and beside her is a basket filled with cleaned crabs...
another crab is falling down...

camera moves to scene 4: to the left
A beautiful girls's leg, with nice Jimmy Choo's shoes, nice complexion, and skin is as smooth as the silk...
sexy music on the background...
the floor is clean
the camera focuses on her beautiful legs up the thigh...
but there is this strange zing-zing noise of scissor,
then suddenly a loud yell of "OH SHIT!" from the 1st man.
camera shifts immediately to the left a bit
saw the lady's left leg on the chair, under the chair is a mountain of black curly hairs,
and the cigarette butt lights up the mountain stack of hairs...smoke billowing up...
then a very sharp voice the girl yelled "WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU DONE!"
the cigarette guy shout back... "Daughter arr, I told you not to shave here!!!"
camera still focusing on that mountain of black curly hairs...
left side is the cigarette man's leg, right is the girl's left leg up the chair, with her left hand holding the scissor.
then both walk away from the table furiously...
camera still focusing on the stack of hairs, fire going to die up
cigarette man's leg walks inside the camera view, splash! a pail of water died out the fire...
Thud! (sound of something hitting the table) Nah! Use this!

"Tiu!, put this off the table!", sound from the woman with crabs. She swings her hand, and the object fell onto the chair, and it rolled and drop onto the stack of hairs...
The object is a SHAVER
the man walked off.

the camera view dims...


Sunday, April 1, 2012

worSE than Zimbabwe...

There is one more place that should have worse inflation than Zimbabwe. And all the $$$ there are monitored by a centralized institution called "THE HELL BANK".

And one question remains...can those notes be used in HEAVEN?